A Crossroads

The year was 2003. I was visiting an OBGYN for the first time to figure out where my little monthly friend had been for the past nine months. Nervous and scared to be visiting this doctor for the first time, I didn't know what to expect. They ran the tests, and my doctor told me I had PCOS.

What did that mean?

My doctor calmly and with a smile informed me that this was a common gynecological disorder. They'd put me on birth control to start up a cycle, and life would be good. Oh, and when I was ready to have a child, she had an "easy fix" to help me.

That was over two years ago. I am still waiting for her promise to come through, and it now appears an "easy fix" will never come. (Certainly didn't come from her after she sent me on my merry way after one month of trying her sure thing before she said, "That's all I can do").

I've tried drugs, gone the natural route, prayed like crazy, given my body a break from the emotional and physical drain, but the end result is still a big fat negative at the end of each month.

After much prayer and discussion we have decided to pursue our first ART (Advanced Reproductive Technology) treatment: IUI. Although for those in the business this is a common procedure, even done by nurses instead of doctors, it is NOT commonplace for me. I know others who have done this procedure, and I always prayed I wouldn't have to do this. The thought of IUI would make me cry because it turns the process of having a child, something that is supposed to be private and exciting, to a procedure that happens in a sterile room with bright lights, an ultrasound monitor, and with way more than two people involved in the process.

For those people who have gotten a baby from this procedure, I fully get and understand why they came to a point to do this, even though I'm sure they must have had some of my same feelings. I am now at that place, too. The hope to expand our family is a greater desire for me than having this process done the way that I dreamed it would happen.

I know I sound like a broken record, but I could use your prayers for:

*Success for the procedure. Let's pray it works!

*That I would be as calm and stress free as possible during this process. Easier said than done.

*Jon and I would draw closer to God and each other during this time.

*That no complications, although rare, would result from the procedure or the meds I have to go on.

*My heart would be prepared for whatever the outcome, and that I would trust God more during this time.

*I am scheduled to go on a church retreat right around the time this procedure might need to occur. Please pray for God's perfect timing.

*However you feel led to pray! :)

The procedure will probably take place within the next two weeks, and I'll only be updating this site for exact dates (not FaceBook or Twitter). I will do my best to post so you can pray specifically on the date of the procedure, too.